Struggling.

Wow. I can't believe it's nearly 1 year since my last post.

Well, here I am. January 2023. Struggling and juggling my life with my two boys. Yes, because my hubby was out of the city since December. Well, he should be home on New Year's day, but yeah you know... life in residency is always fluctuative, unstable, and SUCKS.

Long story short, well my hub had to spent another 30 days again. Yeah, that's sucks. I really hate something.... "unplanned". For someone who has anxiety like me, it is always faaaar waaay ZEN (I mean calmer) to have everything on plan. Moreover, now I have 2 lil boys (well, one of them still a baby tho) whom I have to take care of. Mention it, their basic needs and their emotional needs. Well, sometimes I just want a day off like no "bargaining like at the market", tho what I bargain is about WHAT TIME WILL HE (my eldest) PLAY AT THE PLAYGROUND?

I know it sounds silly, but being a parent is like another level of being patient. I dealt with this kind of situation like EVERYDAY. YES. BECAUSE MY ELDEST IS A REAAALLY STRONG WILLED CHILD AND ALSO WITH BIG EMOTIONS. So everyday I need to make my head cool, that I can response to him way mature, with no exploding emotions. WHICH IS REAAAAALLY HARD YA KNOW, keep calm while the situation is full of cries, shouts and other bothering sounds.